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Dressing Modestly
A WORD TO WOMEN ON MODESTY (Part 5) Print E-mail
Written by Kevin L. Howard   

Way of the world 

 

If you dress immodestly, it shows that you've forgotten why you're on earth.  You are a soldier.  Second Corinthians 10:4 says, "We use God's mighty weapons, not mere worldly weapons, to knock down the Devil's strongholds."  You're in a war for the souls of others.  The Bible warns about becoming like the world.  James 4:4 says, "You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God?  Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God."  If dressing immodestly isn't becoming friends with the world, nothing is. 

 

Exposing what God wants covered shows that you're more of this world than you admit.  It takes courage to choose a different path than the godless culture around you.  And God expects you to choose the path of modesty.

 

Introduction (Part 1) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/153/63/

The daily battle men face (Part 2) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/154/63/

Protecting yourself and men (Part 3) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/155/63/

Getting things backwards (Part 4) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/156/63/

Way of the world (Part 5) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/157/63/

How you sit, bend, and carry yourself (Part 6) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/158/63/

Tips on dressing modestly (Part 7) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/159/63/

Addressing the problem in your church (Part 8) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/160/63/

Legalism versus freedom (Part 9) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/161/63/ 

Conclusion (Part 10) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/162/63/   

 

Bibliography and Further Reading

 

 A 10-part series of the article, "One Man's Plea for Christian Women to Dress Modestly,"

by Kevin L. Howard, www.NeedNotFret.com

 

 
A WORD TO WOMEN ON MODESTY (Part 4) Print E-mail
Written by Kevin L. Howard   

Getting things backwards

 

It seems that many married women are confused.  They dress sexy (low-cut top and short skirts) when they leave the house and dress unsexy (oversized tee-shirts and sweats) at home.  If you're dressing seductively, do it at home where your husband can enjoy it--the only one who's supposed to enjoy it.

 

Married women, if dressing seductively in public is your way of trying to make your husband proud when you're out with him, follow the biblical approach.  If you are a follower of Christ, think deeply on 1 Timothy 2:9-10.  Paul says to Timothy, "I also want women to dress modestly,[1] with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God." 

 

Similarly, 1 Peter 3:3-4 says, "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair[2] and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes.[3]  Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight."  The Bible warns against outward adornments because people inevitably invest too much in the outward person at the neglect of the inner person.  Your virtue is far more important than your outward beauty. 

 

Single ladies, if dressing seductively is your way of luring a man, you'll lure a man all right.  But he won't be the kind you'll want to marry.  If you marry a man you seductively lure to yourself, you'll regret it. 

 

Mystique will make the man you want to marry wonder, in a healthy way, what you've got underneath those clothes.  And marriage will be his ticket to find out.

 

Notes:

[1] The Greek word translated as "modest" or "modesty" derives from the word from which we get "world" and "earth."  In the context of modesty, the word means adornment, order, arrangement, or decoration.

 

[2] Why do the biblical authors make such a big deal out of women's hair?  Take the time to study 1 Corinthians 11 and see what it says about the subject.  The biblical writers, inspired by God, placed significance on hair that modern culture does not.  "Women's hair was a prime object of male lust in the ancient Mediterranean world" (Ed. Gerald Hawthorne, Ralph Martin, and Daniel Reid, Dictionary of Paul and His Letters, Downers Grove, IL.: IVP, 1993, 585).  As Christians, we would be wise to spend more time studying this issue (women showing their hair in public) and discussing its relevance in the modern church.

 

[3] Professor Grudem says, "It is incorrect, therefore, to use this text to prohibit women from braiding their hair or wearing gold jewelry, for by the same reasoning one would have to prohibit 'putting on of clothing.'  Peter's point is not that any of these are forbidden, but that they should not be a woman's 'adorning,' her source of beauty" (Wayne Grudem, 1 Peter, Tyndale New Testament Commentaries, Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 1989 reprint, 140).  I am, however, more persuaded by J. Ramsey Michaels when he says, "Braiding hair and donning jewelry can be viewed together as an extravagance in itself . . . in a way in which the simple 'wearing of clothes' obviously cannot."  But Michaels adds, ". . . Peter's interest is not so much in denouncing certain modes of dress for their own sake, as in making the more general point that outward adornment--of any kind--is not what counts in the sight of God.  Clearly, he did not approve braided hair and conspicuous jewelry with dresses to match, and there is every indication that he shared the viewpoint of his contemporaries that such things were sexually provocative" (J. Ramsey Michaels, 1 Peter, Word Biblical Commentary, Dallas: Word, 1988, 160).

 

Introduction (Part 1) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/153/63/

The daily battle men face (Part 2) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/154/63/

Protecting yourself and men (Part 3) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/155/63/

Getting things backwards (Part 4) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/156/63/

Way of the world (Part 5) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/157/63/

How you sit, bend, and carry yourself (Part 6) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/158/63/

Tips on dressing modestly (Part 7) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/159/63/

Addressing the problem in your church (Part 8) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/160/63/

Legalism versus freedom (Part 9) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/161/63/ 

Conclusion (Part 10) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/162/63/   

 

Bibliography and Further Reading

 

 A 10-part series of the article, "One Man's Plea for Christian Women to Dress Modestly,"

by Kevin L. Howard, www.NeedNotFret.com

 

 
A WORD TO WOMEN ON MODESTY (Part 3) Print E-mail
Written by Kevin L. Howard   

Protecting yourself and men

 

Immodesty not only damages men, but it hurts women too.  When men see women dressed immodestly, men think of them as objects of pleasure.  A woman can't dress immodestly, and then be upset when men don't respect her mind and personality.

 

Even if a man wants to think the best about you, if your clothes send another message, he's going to believe what his eyes tell him--"She's cheap and wants sex," or "She's wearing a tight shirt, so she must want me to notice her boobs."

 

God made men with a deep desire to connect sexually with a woman.  But Satan uses this against us and wants us to lust and masturbate over every attractive woman we see.  When you dress like the women on TV, you play into most men's prime weakness.  At least the married men can have sex when they get stirred up, but what does your immodesty do for teens and singles who have no legitimate sexual outlet?

 

Introduction (Part 1) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/153/63/

The daily battle men face (Part 2) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/154/63/

Protecting yourself and men (Part 3) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/155/63/

Getting things backwards (Part 4) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/156/63/

Way of the world (Part 5) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/157/63/

How you sit, bend, and carry yourself (Part 6) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/158/63/

Tips on dressing modestly (Part 7) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/159/63/

Addressing the problem in your church (Part 8) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/160/63/

Legalism versus freedom (Part 9) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/161/63/ 

Conclusion (Part 10) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/162/63/   

 

Bibliography and Further Reading

 

 A 10-part series of the article, "One Man's Plea for Christian Women to Dress Modestly,"

by Kevin L. Howard, www.NeedNotFret.com

 

 
A WORD TO WOMEN ON MODESTY (Part 2) Print E-mail
Written by Kevin L. Howard   

The daily battle men face

 

Many women dress appropriately, and to those I say bravo.  But at the risk of being overly negative, I want to address the problem of immodesty.  Unfortunately, many women today don't know what modesty is.  If someone encourages them to dress modestly, they'll put on tight shorts, a tank-top, and never think twice about it. 

 

Immodesty can be put in perspective when women understand the stronghold that lust and pornography have on men today.  The pornography industry in the United States rakes in 12 billion dollars a year.  Surveys taken by Promise Keepers, Focus on the Family, Insight for Living, and other reputable Christian organizations show about half of the male respondents indicated they've viewed porn within the past few months.  Did you get that?  If this statistic is correct, five of 10 men you see in church have looked at porn recently.  Some of them have looked at it daily.  And who knows how many more of the "innocent" 50 percent have recently leafed through a bikini magazine or watched steamy R-rated movies? 

 

Men who want to stay pure are finding impurity pursuing them.  Many commercials feature scantly clad women showing off their God-given goods.  Almost everywhere a man looks he sees skin--from the magazines at the check-out counter to the billboards along the highway. 

 

If he can't get away from this overly sexed culture even at church, he begins to think the fight isn't worth the cost.  I'm not excusing lust; I'm just painting a realistic picture of the battle men encounter daily.  It's not easy to stay pure in today's culture.  A man may be doing fine with his thoughts one minute, and then a woman in a short skirt, high heels, and painted toenails walks by, and something stirs within him.  He starts thinking about how he can relieve the sexual pressure that bubbles somewhere deep in his soul. 

 

Introduction (Part 1) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/153/63/

The daily battle men face (Part 2) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/154/63/

Protecting yourself and men (Part 3) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/155/63/

Getting things backwards (Part 4) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/156/63/

Way of the world (Part 5) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/157/63/

How you sit, bend, and carry yourself (Part 6) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/158/63/

Tips on dressing modestly (Part 7) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/159/63/

Addressing the problem in your church (Part 8) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/160/63/

Legalism versus freedom (Part 9) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/161/63/ 

Conclusion (Part 10) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/162/63/   

 

Bibliography and Further Reading

 

 A 10-part series of the article, "One Man's Plea for Christian Women to Dress Modestly,"

by Kevin L. Howard, www.NeedNotFret.com

 

 
A WORD TO WOMEN ON MODESTY (Part 1) Print E-mail
Written by Kevin L. Howard   

Introduction

 

Many women love to show off their backs with their spaghetti-string tops, while sporting low-rider jeans or cute miniskirts.  And frankly, I love them too.  That's why I'm writing.

 

My wife, daughter, and I [used to] live in Southern California with nice weather nearly year round.  But summers usher in gorgeous sunny days.  And when the temperature rises, I've noticed the clothes become skimpy, even at church.

 

When I worship with other believers, I'm frequently exhausted from the work week.  I need the spiritual meal my pastor will place in front of me.  Yet, the exposed skin of the Christian women sitting nearby distracts me.

 

When women think they're simply wearing what's fashionable, they might be provoking the men around them to turn their devotions away from God.

 

Introduction (Part 1) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/153/63/

The daily battle men face (Part 2) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/154/63/

Protecting yourself and men (Part 3) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/155/63/

Getting things backwards (Part 4) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/156/63/

Way of the world (Part 5) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/157/63/

How you sit, bend, and carry yourself (Part 6) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/158/63/

Tips on dressing modestly (Part 7) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/159/63/

Addressing the problem in your church (Part 8) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/160/63/

Legalism versus freedom (Part 9) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/161/63/ 

Conclusion (Part 10) http://www.neednotfret.com/content/view/162/63/   

 

Bibliography and Further Reading

 

 A 10-part series of the article, "One Man's Plea for Christian Women to Dress Modestly,"

by Kevin L. Howard, www.NeedNotFret.com

 

 
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